Sock Monkey Festival

Just look at that poster - in all its laser-eyed, UFO glory - and tell me you're not going to the Sock Monkey Festival in Rockford this weekend.

Perhaps best-known as the birthplace of Cheap Trick, Rockford also gave the world the sock knitting machine. The garments from said machine became the basis for the Sock Monkey, the classic brown-and-red stuffed animal toted by generations of kiddies.

The city pays homage every March with two days of monkey-making workshops, the Sock Monkey Hall of Fame inductions, and Ms Sockford Beauty and Talent Pageant. Meat will be served, monkeys will be healed (at Sockford General Hospital), and who knows - Cheap Trick may bust out an ax.

Watch this video by author Ron Warren to see monkey madness in action.

Plumbers of St. Patrick's Day

They're at it again, those magical, plunger-wielding gents of the local plumbers' union. They're dying the Chicago River green tomorrow at 10:45am. (The how's and why's are described in this earlier post.)

The St. Pat's Parade queues thereafter. Then the beer drinking commences. Two excellent places to get your Irish on are the Irish American Heritage Center, which has a first-floor pub that opens on Friday and Saturday nights only and fills with oldsters from the Old Country; and Christina's Place, a corner tavern that pours $2 pints of Guinness all day, every day, year round. It's fiddle players and fish-and-chips in the former, karaoke and microwave pizzas in the latter - both fit for the finest of plumbers.

When the Polkaholics Met L'il Wally

What happens when the Polkaholics, Chicago's favorite punk-polka band, meets L'il Wally, old-school polka meister and frequent Lawrence Welk guest? Find out at the documentary premiere of Polkaholics at the Chicago International Movies and Music Fest.

Be assured it will involve jaunty accordions and Wally classics like Hot Pants and In Heaven There is No Beer (that's why we drink it here). Wally died a few years ago, but not before racking up 17 gold and 4 platinum records and a personal blessing from Pope John Paul, who said "God will reward you for all your hard work."

The swinging begins at the Cultural Center at 8pm tonight.

You Say Syrup, Funk's Grove Says Sirup

No, it's not a typo. About 145 miles southwest of Chicago, not far beyond Bloomington on Old Route 66, Funk's Grove is a 19th-century maple-syrup farm. Actually, it's sirup – with an "i" – which means the product is naturally sweet. When spelled with a "y" it means the makers have added fruit juice to enhance it.

At Funk's they tap and boil the sirup from mid-February to mid-March, depending on the weather. And though it sounds like a sweet job, it takes 50 gallons of sap to make 1 gallon of sirup, so it ain't easy. The family sells their wares from a store onsite (free samples!). The sirup is usually available between March and August.

Just down the road is the Sugar Grove Nature Center with trails and birdwatching, and a brooding graveyard and chapel. Together, they make Funk's Grove a surprisingly impressive jaunt.

But if that's too far to drive to sauce your pancakes, try North Park Nature Center by Pulaski and Peterson Rds., which hosts Maple Syrup Fest this weekend.

Dye Me A River

Chicago's premier St. Patrick's Day tradition started by accident almost 50 years ago. Plumbers were using dye in the Chicago River to test for chemical spills, and holy leprechaun! The dye turned the river a perfect shamrock green.

The plumbers' union still does the honors each year, dropping in the secret-recipe (and biodegradable) coloring from Columbus Drive Bridge. The magic happens at 10:45am today. The best spot to see it is from the bridge's east side.

The St. Pat's Parade follows at noon. Tall-hat-wearing brass bands, curly-haired step dancers, and giant inflatable leprechauns float down Columbus Drive from Balbo northward.

Movies + Music = CIMM Fest

There's a new fest in town. The Chicago International Movies and Music Festival, aka CIMM Fest, reels through the Windy City from March 5-9. It presents movies. And music. And movies about music, which is the main gist. The grand finale is the Wilco documentary Ashes of American Flags at the Music Box Theatre.

The rest of the events take place at various Wicker Park venues and at the Chicago Cultural Center. The latter is worth a visit in and of itself.

After the Great Fire ravaged Chicago, Britain's Queen Victoria sent over a box of books to cheer up everybody. Actually, it was a great big box, and the city needed somewhere to put them all. So it built a library. Not just any old library - rather, one modeled after the Doge's Palace in Venice. No one's really sure why. But, hey, more people might read if they could do it surrounded by marble, brass and the world's largest Tiffany stained-glass dome.

Eventually, the library moved to larger digs down the road, and the building morphed into the Cultural Center.

Puppet Bike Party

You can't help but smile when Clover the Bunny (an aspiring starlet) and Chock the Kitty (a blues musician and dice-rolling gambler) dance together under the glittering disco ball. Which is why many people refer to the Puppet Bike as a "happiness maker."

The Puppet Bike, in case you haven't had the pleasure to meet it downtown or in Andersonville, is a mobile theater atop a jolly red tricycle. A lone puppeteer parks it at varying street corners and puts on a show with Clover, Chock and five other hand-operated critters. Solar panels power the boom box that blasts jazzy music. Out front kids wave, jump and dance around in circles - just like the puppets.

Each year the Peter Jones Gallery hosts the two-day Puppet Bike Extravaganza with bands, costumes and revelry. The bash rages this Friday and Saturday, Feb. 27 and 28; admission is by donation.